职位信息及网申地址【花旗网站】：
http://www.oncampus.citi.com/
Programs(China)
1. Analyst (Investment Banking - Regional)- China
Employment type: Full-time, Summer Internship
Degree: Undergraduate or Masters
Locations: Beijing, Hong Kong
Application Deadline: Full-time Analyst program：October 27, 2008 for China schools
Summer Analyst program：December 5, 2008
2. Associate (Investment Banking - Regional)- China
Employment type: Full-time, Summer Internship
Degree: MBALocations: Hong Kong
Application Deadline: Full-time Associate program：October 27, 2008 for China schools
Summer Associate program：December 5, 2008
3. Country Management Associate program- Full-time(China)
Employment type: Full-time
Degree: Master
Locations: Beijing, Shanghai, Shenzhen, Guangzhou, Hang Zhou, Cheng Du, Da Lian and Tian jin.
Application Deadline: November 15, 2008
4. Country Summer Internship- Summer Internship(China)
Employment type: Summer Internship
Degree: Master
Locations: Beijing and Shanghai
Application Deadline: March 31, 2009
About Citi
As the pre-eminent global financial services company, we boast over 200 million diverse clients - including some of the most influential names in the business world. The benefits of our size add up to a lot more than a collection of statistics though. The proportions of our business place us in a unique and eminent position. Because - over 200 years - we've brought together some of the world's most successful and diverse financial companies to form one Citi with unparalleled strength across over 100 countries in four regions: North America, EMEA (Europe, Middle East and Afirca), Asia-Pacific and Latin America.
Our structure
As a whole, we are one Citi, working together to help our clients turn their dreams into realities. We provide the full range of financial services to every type of client, and are structured into a number of different business areas. These break down as follows:
Institutional Clients Group (ICG) Consumer Banking Global Wealth Management Global Cards Corporate Functions To find out more click on the relevent business group on the left-hand navigation of this page.
Our culture
On the outside, we're known as an impressive global leader, but we know that there are more reasons that people join and stay at Citi. Those reasons relate to what we offer on the inside: our people, the way we do business, and the opportunities to grow here.
One thing that all our people appreciate is the sense of opportunity. It manifests itself in many ways and, when you join Citi, you experience it every day. By being part of a truly international business, you'll enjoy wide career choices and broad development opportunities. What's more, because innovation is fundamental to our success, there's a sense of freedom. In a genuinely supportive environment, working alongside the top talent in the industry, that doesn't just mean you have the chance to push boundaries: it gives you the opportunity to break them.
2008年9月23日星期二
渣打银行2009校园招聘
招聘职位：
【1】International Graduate Programme（国际管理培训生计划）Find out more
http://www.standardchartered.com/careers/graduates/en/index.html
【2】China Banking Associate Programme（中国本土管理培训生计划）Find out more
http://www.standardchartered.com/careers/banking-associates/overview/en/index.html
FAQ:
How many Banking Associates do you recruit every year in China?
We recruit around 60 Banking Associates every year in China.
What are the similarities and differences between the International Graduate Programme and the Banking Associate Programme?
Both programmes are trainee development programmes for our managerial pipeline. The International Graduate Programme is focused on international development and is run by the Bank's Head Office. The Banking Associate Programme is focused on the Chinese market, to meet the needs of dramatic business growth locally. Trainees in both programmes experience well-designed development frameworks that include classroom training, on-the-job rotations and mentoring from managers.
Does it matter if I don't have a background in finance?
Not at all. We welcome applications from people with a variety of degree disciplines. Our main concern is that you display the talents we're looking for, and you're enthusiastic about making a difference at Standard Chartered. You can do this by passing our online assessments and doing well at your interview.
Do I need any work experience?
No, work experience is just one of the many factors we consider. We also look at your talents and skills - you may have gained these through other life experiences, such as travel, study, research or community activities.
More FAQ
职位信息及网申地址（渣打银行网站）：
http://www.standardchartered.com/careers/banking-associates/en/index.html
【1】International Graduate Programme（国际管理培训生计划）Find out more
http://www.standardchartered.com/careers/graduates/en/index.html
【2】China Banking Associate Programme（中国本土管理培训生计划）Find out more
http://www.standardchartered.com/careers/banking-associates/overview/en/index.html
FAQ:
How many Banking Associates do you recruit every year in China?
We recruit around 60 Banking Associates every year in China.
What are the similarities and differences between the International Graduate Programme and the Banking Associate Programme?
Both programmes are trainee development programmes for our managerial pipeline. The International Graduate Programme is focused on international development and is run by the Bank's Head Office. The Banking Associate Programme is focused on the Chinese market, to meet the needs of dramatic business growth locally. Trainees in both programmes experience well-designed development frameworks that include classroom training, on-the-job rotations and mentoring from managers.
Does it matter if I don't have a background in finance?
Not at all. We welcome applications from people with a variety of degree disciplines. Our main concern is that you display the talents we're looking for, and you're enthusiastic about making a difference at Standard Chartered. You can do this by passing our online assessments and doing well at your interview.
Do I need any work experience?
No, work experience is just one of the many factors we consider. We also look at your talents and skills - you may have gained these through other life experiences, such as travel, study, research or community activities.
More FAQ
职位信息及网申地址（渣打银行网站）：
http://www.standardchartered.com/careers/banking-associates/en/index.html
汇丰银行2009校园招聘
About HSBC
Established in Hong Kong and Shanghai in 1865。
The Hongkong and Shanghai Banking Corporation Limited (HSBC) is the founding member of the HSBC Group - one of the world's largest banking and financial services organisations with around 10,000 offices in 83 countries and territories - and its flagship in the Asia-Pacific region. HSBC is the largest bank incorporated in the Hong Kong Special Administrative Region and one of the SAR's three note-issuing banks.
In mainland China, HSBC has had a continuous presence for over 140 years. On 2 April 2007, HSBC Bank (China) Company Limited (HSBC China) started operations as a wholly-foreign-owned bank solely owned by The Hongkong and Shanghai Banking Corporation Limited. With its headquarters in Shanghai, HSBC China incorporated the previous mainland China offices of The Hongkong and Shanghai Banking Corporation Limited.
In HSBC, we believe people are fundamental to our business and its success. One of the key priorities in our People Strategy is to identify, develop, and retain high potential talents. The Bank will continue to dedicate significant resources to develop local talents into professional bankers.
PRC Banker Development Programme HSBC's PRC Banker Development Programme (BDP) was established in 1991 with an objective to develop banking specialists and future leaders through practical experience and skills training.
The 18-month programme includes classroom training, on-the-job training, job rotation and attachments to various businesses and functions across HSBC China, as well as in other HSBC locations overseas.
There are five business focussed streams in our BDP, each designed to optimise the learning experience and provide trainees with skill sets specific to the respective business needs. Following is a brief description of each of the five business areas.
Personal Financial Services (PFS)
HSBC offers a wide range of PFS products and services to respond to our customers' financial needs. PFS core customer proposition is HSBC Premier; the world's first globally linked-up banking service. HSBC Premier is a personalised banking and wealth management solution that enables our customers to explore and seize all the rich opportunities the world now has to offer. Leveraging our international expertise and local distribution network, we provide wealth management products and services in accordance with customers' financial needs in different life stages, including structured investments, capital protected investments, Qualified Domestic Institutional Investor Plans (QDII), insurance and more.
Global Banking (GB)
GB focuses on building relationships and developing profitable business with select large multinational companies investing into China, and large PRC domestic companies, particularly those trading/investing internationally, where we can leverage the HSBC Group's global network to provide international solutions. We provide Credit and Lending and account services and work with specialists from Trade and Supply Chain, Payment and Cash Management, Global Markets and Investment Banking to provide value-added services to our customers.
Commercial Banking (CMB)
HSBC Commercial Banking is one of the Bank's core business lines, with a more than 140-year history and operations in 64 countries and territories. We focus on delivering solutions for Leading International Businesses (LIB) while striving to be the best bank for small business. To drive the LIB strategy, we sell China solutions to foreign invested enterprises while differentiating ourselves by offering our international capabilities to the growing number of outbound Chinese companies.
In being the best bank for small business, our SME strategy focuses on "internationally oriented, larger SMEs" by leveraging our international trade expertise.
Global Transactional Banking (GTB)
Global Transactional Banking includes specialized product areas of Securities Services and Trade Supply Chain.
Operations and Processing (OPP)
The aim of Operations and Information Technology (OPP & IT) is to be recognized internally as an excellent business support team which delivers efficient and cost-effective processing for our external customers. We help facilitate network expansion, building robust and scalable operations infrastructure. We streamline our processes by centralizing core functions at Global Resourcing, while outsourcing selected ones to third parties, so as to improve workflow efficiency and reduce costs. We also identify and control operational risks and deepen relationships with strategic partners.
Recruitment Process
To evaluate whether applicants possess the management potential and key qualities, HSBC uses a multiple assessment process which includes:
*Aptitude Test
* Phone interview
* HR Capability-based Interview
* Graduate Assessment centre
* Line Manager Evaluation
Application Method
To be considered, you must have at least a bachelor degree from any discipline gained from a reputable university, with good academic standing. We will consider undergraduates who have gained up to 3 years' working experience. We look for candidates with good academic achievement, proficiency in Chinese and English, who can demonstrate the following Key Qualities:
Driving Business Vision and Brand
Is innovative and forward looking. Establishes team and personal objectives that are aligned with HSBC's business goals. Supports the differentiation of HSBC and its brand from competitors.
Business Judgment
Understands and interprets business information and makes high quality and timely decisions within a business context. Applies entrepreneurial and business thinking to deliver revenue growth, control costs and manage risks.
Leading Performance
Leads, inspires and develops others to deliver business performance. Role models HSBC's values and instills trust in others.
Customer Drive
Committed to the delivery of outstanding customer service. Wins new and lasting customer relationships.
Working with Others
Works collaboratively and communicates persuasively, emphasizing teamwork, diversity, learning and knowledge sharing.
Drive, Commitment and Personal Development
Demonstrates a high degree of commitment to HSBC and drives self to achieve business and personal goals, overcoming obstacles as they arise.
To complete an on-line application for the Banker Development Programme, please visit: www.hsbc.com.cn/careers
Established in Hong Kong and Shanghai in 1865。
The Hongkong and Shanghai Banking Corporation Limited (HSBC) is the founding member of the HSBC Group - one of the world's largest banking and financial services organisations with around 10,000 offices in 83 countries and territories - and its flagship in the Asia-Pacific region. HSBC is the largest bank incorporated in the Hong Kong Special Administrative Region and one of the SAR's three note-issuing banks.
In mainland China, HSBC has had a continuous presence for over 140 years. On 2 April 2007, HSBC Bank (China) Company Limited (HSBC China) started operations as a wholly-foreign-owned bank solely owned by The Hongkong and Shanghai Banking Corporation Limited. With its headquarters in Shanghai, HSBC China incorporated the previous mainland China offices of The Hongkong and Shanghai Banking Corporation Limited.
In HSBC, we believe people are fundamental to our business and its success. One of the key priorities in our People Strategy is to identify, develop, and retain high potential talents. The Bank will continue to dedicate significant resources to develop local talents into professional bankers.
PRC Banker Development Programme HSBC's PRC Banker Development Programme (BDP) was established in 1991 with an objective to develop banking specialists and future leaders through practical experience and skills training.
The 18-month programme includes classroom training, on-the-job training, job rotation and attachments to various businesses and functions across HSBC China, as well as in other HSBC locations overseas.
There are five business focussed streams in our BDP, each designed to optimise the learning experience and provide trainees with skill sets specific to the respective business needs. Following is a brief description of each of the five business areas.
Personal Financial Services (PFS)
HSBC offers a wide range of PFS products and services to respond to our customers' financial needs. PFS core customer proposition is HSBC Premier; the world's first globally linked-up banking service. HSBC Premier is a personalised banking and wealth management solution that enables our customers to explore and seize all the rich opportunities the world now has to offer. Leveraging our international expertise and local distribution network, we provide wealth management products and services in accordance with customers' financial needs in different life stages, including structured investments, capital protected investments, Qualified Domestic Institutional Investor Plans (QDII), insurance and more.
Global Banking (GB)
GB focuses on building relationships and developing profitable business with select large multinational companies investing into China, and large PRC domestic companies, particularly those trading/investing internationally, where we can leverage the HSBC Group's global network to provide international solutions. We provide Credit and Lending and account services and work with specialists from Trade and Supply Chain, Payment and Cash Management, Global Markets and Investment Banking to provide value-added services to our customers.
Commercial Banking (CMB)
HSBC Commercial Banking is one of the Bank's core business lines, with a more than 140-year history and operations in 64 countries and territories. We focus on delivering solutions for Leading International Businesses (LIB) while striving to be the best bank for small business. To drive the LIB strategy, we sell China solutions to foreign invested enterprises while differentiating ourselves by offering our international capabilities to the growing number of outbound Chinese companies.
In being the best bank for small business, our SME strategy focuses on "internationally oriented, larger SMEs" by leveraging our international trade expertise.
Global Transactional Banking (GTB)
Global Transactional Banking includes specialized product areas of Securities Services and Trade Supply Chain.
Operations and Processing (OPP)
The aim of Operations and Information Technology (OPP & IT) is to be recognized internally as an excellent business support team which delivers efficient and cost-effective processing for our external customers. We help facilitate network expansion, building robust and scalable operations infrastructure. We streamline our processes by centralizing core functions at Global Resourcing, while outsourcing selected ones to third parties, so as to improve workflow efficiency and reduce costs. We also identify and control operational risks and deepen relationships with strategic partners.
Recruitment Process
To evaluate whether applicants possess the management potential and key qualities, HSBC uses a multiple assessment process which includes:
*Aptitude Test
* Phone interview
* HR Capability-based Interview
* Graduate Assessment centre
* Line Manager Evaluation
Application Method
To be considered, you must have at least a bachelor degree from any discipline gained from a reputable university, with good academic standing. We will consider undergraduates who have gained up to 3 years' working experience. We look for candidates with good academic achievement, proficiency in Chinese and English, who can demonstrate the following Key Qualities:
Driving Business Vision and Brand
Is innovative and forward looking. Establishes team and personal objectives that are aligned with HSBC's business goals. Supports the differentiation of HSBC and its brand from competitors.
Business Judgment
Understands and interprets business information and makes high quality and timely decisions within a business context. Applies entrepreneurial and business thinking to deliver revenue growth, control costs and manage risks.
Leading Performance
Leads, inspires and develops others to deliver business performance. Role models HSBC's values and instills trust in others.
Customer Drive
Committed to the delivery of outstanding customer service. Wins new and lasting customer relationships.
Working with Others
Works collaboratively and communicates persuasively, emphasizing teamwork, diversity, learning and knowledge sharing.
Drive, Commitment and Personal Development
Demonstrates a high degree of commitment to HSBC and drives self to achieve business and personal goals, overcoming obstacles as they arise.
To complete an on-line application for the Banker Development Programme, please visit: www.hsbc.com.cn/careers
Synopsys 2009 校园招聘
Please send your resume via Email: prccampus@synopsys.com
SNPS-001
Job Title: R&D Engineer
Job Description:
This person will work within the quality assurance group for Primeyield-LCC (Lithography Compliance Check) product line. He or she will develop and deploy tools and software test methodologies that will help to continually improve and validate the quality, consistency, and performance of the PV products. This person will be responsible for running and monitoring regression tests that ensure reliability and accuracy, benchmarking different versions of the software to measure performance, and testing the integration and flow between Hercules and other Synopsys products.
Requirement: Candidates for this position must have a BS in CS/EE with 3+ years or a MS in CS/EE with 1+ year of experience in programming and/or testing computer software in a Unix/Linux environment. The individual should also have basic experience developing and testing C code, building and debugging Perl scripts, and implementing and updating web content via web programming languages. Experience in software testing methodologies, programming tools such as Purify, PureCoverage and Valgrind, and IC design/layout are also highly desirable. Candidates must have solid organizational and analysis skills, the ability to communicate effectively, and the desire to work together as a team. He or she should also be highly motivated to learn new skills and explore different technologies.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-002
Job Title: R&D Engineer
Description:
-Responsible for designing, developing, troubleshooting or debugging software programs
-Develops software tools including operating systems, compilers, routers, networks, utilities, databases and internet-related tools, etc.
-Determines hardware compatibility and/or influences hardware design
-Expected to identify classical solutions to problems with little guidance, and implement these independently
-Works on problems of moderate scope where analysis of situations or data requires a review of identifiable factors
-Proficient in one specific technical area
- Works primarily with manager and other engineers across teams.
Requirements:
-Able to design algorithms and data structures
-The individual should have experience on development of complex software projects, familiarity with C/C++ coding, and a strong background in data structures and algorithms are required for this position
-It is essential that the individual has strong desires to learn and explore new technologies and are able to demonstrate good analysis and problem solving skills
-Prior knowledge and experience of CAD tool development are required
- MS in CS, relevant experience in programming software for operating systems, utilizing machine assembly and/or job control languages, and knowledge of software capabilities is preferred
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-003
Verification Group Introduction
Verification group deliver industry leading IC functional verification platform(VCS) and methodology(VMM/System Verilog). Our product solve high end ICs&SOCs verification complexity and productivity challenges with advanced HDL compiler and comprehensive debugging environment
Verification Group –Software Product Development Job Description
- Responsible for designing, developing, troubleshooting software products for IC functional verification in Unix/Linux environment
- Works with managers and other engineers both in Shanghai and in US to identify solutions to problems and implement independently
- The software development work is related with HDL compiler, GUI, HDL debugging technologies
Verification Group – Job Requirement
- Must have very strong C/C++ software development skills
- Strong background in data structure and algorithms are required
- Self-initiative and ability to work in a multi-national team
- Knowledge of compiler/HDL/GUI development is a plus - MS/PhD in CS/EE
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-004
Job Title: R&D Engineer
Description:
-Responsible for designing, developing, troubleshooting or debugging software programs.
-Able to design algorithms and data structure for component of EDA software programs.
-Expected to identify classical solutions to request with little guidance.
-Maintains quality standards and improves performance for our products
-Resolve code porting issues for builds and release images on multiple platforms.
Requirements:
-MS in CS, EE or Mathematics with strong Analog/Digital IC or EDA Knowledge.
-One or more years of software development experience for medium to large software development systems
-Previous experience in the development of IC design tools is highly desirable
-Excellent programming skills in Tcl/Tk, C and C++ on UNIX and/or LINUX platforms.
-Self-motivation, self-discipline and the ability to set personal goals.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-005
Job Title: R&D Engineer
Description:
-Responsible for designing, developing, troubleshooting or debugging software programs.
-Able to design algorithms and data structure for PARSER.
-Maintains quality standards and improves performance for our products
-Resolve code porting issues for builds and release images on multiple platforms.
Requirements:
-MS in EE or with strong Verilog/VHDL/SPICE Knowledge.
-One or more years of software development experience for medium to large software development systems
-Previous experience in the development of IC design tools is highly desirable
-Excellent programming skills in Lex/Yacc, C and C++ on UNIX and/or LINUX platforms
-Self-motivation, self-discipline and the ability to set personal goals.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-006
Job Title: R&D Engineer
Description:
-Responsible for designing, developing, troubleshooting or debugging software programs
-Develops circuit simulation tools to provide solutions for nanometer circuit function, timing and power verification, analog behavior modeling and signal integrity verification
-Works on complex problems where analysis of problems or data requires an in-depth evaluation of various factors
-Exercises judgment within broadly defined EDA technology and semiconductor design practices in selecting methods, techniques, and solutions for obtaining results
-Develops state of the art solutions through technical contributions that lead to significant product differentiation.
Requirements:
-Requires a minimum of 2 years experience in developing design automation tools on UNIX platforms
-Knowledge of electronic circuit analysis methods and efficient mathematical computation algorithms are essential -Analog circuit design and modeling experience are desirable
-The individual should have experience on development of complex software projects, familiarity with C/C++ coding, and a strong background in data structures and algorithms
-It is essential that the individual has a strong desire to learn and explore new technologies and is able to demonstrate good analysis and problem solving skills.
-MS EE/CS/Physics or related field required, Ph.D. preferred
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-007
Job Title: R&D Engineer
Description:
-Responsible for designing, developing, and debugging transistor level simulators involving the compilers, utilities, databases and output tools
-Expected to analyze project areas, refine problem descriptions, and develop novel technical solutions. Write technical specs -Design and apply API for module design.
Requirements:
-Have strong background in data structures and algorithms
-Have strong desires to learn and explore new technologies and capable to demonstrate good analysis and problem solving skills
-Produce consistently high quality technical solutions and code implementations independently
-Prior knowledge and experience of transistor level simulator or compiler development (using lex and yacc) are big plus
-Must be proficiency in English communication (in both writing and oral).
- MS/PhD in CS, experience in developing complex software, familiar with C/C++ coding is preferred.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-008
Job Title: Sr. Software Engineer
Description:
-Responsible to support software development, integration and release, life cycle automation, and configuration management for the global Synopsys R&D teams.
-Develops tools and scripts for configuration management, process automation, databases, and dynamic web pages.
- Works on problems of diverse scope where analysis of data requires evaluation of identifiable factors.
- Expected to analyze project areas, refine problem descriptions, and develop novel technical solutions.
- Exercises judgment within generally defined practices and policies in selecting methods and techniques for obtaining solutions.
- Produce consistently high quality technical solutions and code implementations independently.
Requirements:
-BS in CS/CSE with 5+ years or MS with 3+ years of relevant experience in UNIX, Perl, shell scripting languages, programming languages including C and C++, CGI and HTML.
-Significant experience with software integration and release, build tools (make/gmake, etc), and software configuration management tools (RCS, CVS, Clearcase, Perforce, etc).
-It is essential that the individual has strong desires to learn and explore new technologies and are able to demonstrate good analysis and problem solving skills.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-009
Job Title: Software Engineer
Description:
-Responsible to support software development, integration and release, life cycle automation, and configuration management for the global Synopsys R&D teams.
-Develops tools and scripts for configuration management, process automation, databases, and dynamic web pages.
-Expected to identify classical solutions to problems with little guidance, and implement these independently.
-Works on problems of moderate scope where analysis of situations or data requires a review of identifiable factors.
-Proficient in one specific technical area.
-Works primarily with manager and other engineers across teams.
Requirements:
-BS in CS/CSE with 3+ years of experience in UNIX, Perl, shell scripting languages, programming languages including C and C++, CGI and HTML. Prior knowledge and experience with software integration and release, build tools (make/gmake, etc), and software configuration management tools (RCS, CVS, Clearcase, Perforce, etc).
- It is essential that the individual has strong desires to learn and explore new technologies and are able to demonstrate good analysis and problem solving skills.
SNPS-001
Job Title: R&D Engineer
Job Description:
This person will work within the quality assurance group for Primeyield-LCC (Lithography Compliance Check) product line. He or she will develop and deploy tools and software test methodologies that will help to continually improve and validate the quality, consistency, and performance of the PV products. This person will be responsible for running and monitoring regression tests that ensure reliability and accuracy, benchmarking different versions of the software to measure performance, and testing the integration and flow between Hercules and other Synopsys products.
Requirement: Candidates for this position must have a BS in CS/EE with 3+ years or a MS in CS/EE with 1+ year of experience in programming and/or testing computer software in a Unix/Linux environment. The individual should also have basic experience developing and testing C code, building and debugging Perl scripts, and implementing and updating web content via web programming languages. Experience in software testing methodologies, programming tools such as Purify, PureCoverage and Valgrind, and IC design/layout are also highly desirable. Candidates must have solid organizational and analysis skills, the ability to communicate effectively, and the desire to work together as a team. He or she should also be highly motivated to learn new skills and explore different technologies.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-002
Job Title: R&D Engineer
Description:
-Responsible for designing, developing, troubleshooting or debugging software programs
-Develops software tools including operating systems, compilers, routers, networks, utilities, databases and internet-related tools, etc.
-Determines hardware compatibility and/or influences hardware design
-Expected to identify classical solutions to problems with little guidance, and implement these independently
-Works on problems of moderate scope where analysis of situations or data requires a review of identifiable factors
-Proficient in one specific technical area
- Works primarily with manager and other engineers across teams.
Requirements:
-Able to design algorithms and data structures
-The individual should have experience on development of complex software projects, familiarity with C/C++ coding, and a strong background in data structures and algorithms are required for this position
-It is essential that the individual has strong desires to learn and explore new technologies and are able to demonstrate good analysis and problem solving skills
-Prior knowledge and experience of CAD tool development are required
- MS in CS, relevant experience in programming software for operating systems, utilizing machine assembly and/or job control languages, and knowledge of software capabilities is preferred
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-003
Verification Group Introduction
Verification group deliver industry leading IC functional verification platform(VCS) and methodology(VMM/System Verilog). Our product solve high end ICs&SOCs verification complexity and productivity challenges with advanced HDL compiler and comprehensive debugging environment
Verification Group –Software Product Development Job Description
- Responsible for designing, developing, troubleshooting software products for IC functional verification in Unix/Linux environment
- Works with managers and other engineers both in Shanghai and in US to identify solutions to problems and implement independently
- The software development work is related with HDL compiler, GUI, HDL debugging technologies
Verification Group – Job Requirement
- Must have very strong C/C++ software development skills
- Strong background in data structure and algorithms are required
- Self-initiative and ability to work in a multi-national team
- Knowledge of compiler/HDL/GUI development is a plus - MS/PhD in CS/EE
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-004
Job Title: R&D Engineer
Description:
-Responsible for designing, developing, troubleshooting or debugging software programs.
-Able to design algorithms and data structure for component of EDA software programs.
-Expected to identify classical solutions to request with little guidance.
-Maintains quality standards and improves performance for our products
-Resolve code porting issues for builds and release images on multiple platforms.
Requirements:
-MS in CS, EE or Mathematics with strong Analog/Digital IC or EDA Knowledge.
-One or more years of software development experience for medium to large software development systems
-Previous experience in the development of IC design tools is highly desirable
-Excellent programming skills in Tcl/Tk, C and C++ on UNIX and/or LINUX platforms.
-Self-motivation, self-discipline and the ability to set personal goals.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-005
Job Title: R&D Engineer
Description:
-Responsible for designing, developing, troubleshooting or debugging software programs.
-Able to design algorithms and data structure for PARSER.
-Maintains quality standards and improves performance for our products
-Resolve code porting issues for builds and release images on multiple platforms.
Requirements:
-MS in EE or with strong Verilog/VHDL/SPICE Knowledge.
-One or more years of software development experience for medium to large software development systems
-Previous experience in the development of IC design tools is highly desirable
-Excellent programming skills in Lex/Yacc, C and C++ on UNIX and/or LINUX platforms
-Self-motivation, self-discipline and the ability to set personal goals.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-006
Job Title: R&D Engineer
Description:
-Responsible for designing, developing, troubleshooting or debugging software programs
-Develops circuit simulation tools to provide solutions for nanometer circuit function, timing and power verification, analog behavior modeling and signal integrity verification
-Works on complex problems where analysis of problems or data requires an in-depth evaluation of various factors
-Exercises judgment within broadly defined EDA technology and semiconductor design practices in selecting methods, techniques, and solutions for obtaining results
-Develops state of the art solutions through technical contributions that lead to significant product differentiation.
Requirements:
-Requires a minimum of 2 years experience in developing design automation tools on UNIX platforms
-Knowledge of electronic circuit analysis methods and efficient mathematical computation algorithms are essential -Analog circuit design and modeling experience are desirable
-The individual should have experience on development of complex software projects, familiarity with C/C++ coding, and a strong background in data structures and algorithms
-It is essential that the individual has a strong desire to learn and explore new technologies and is able to demonstrate good analysis and problem solving skills.
-MS EE/CS/Physics or related field required, Ph.D. preferred
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-007
Job Title: R&D Engineer
Description:
-Responsible for designing, developing, and debugging transistor level simulators involving the compilers, utilities, databases and output tools
-Expected to analyze project areas, refine problem descriptions, and develop novel technical solutions. Write technical specs -Design and apply API for module design.
Requirements:
-Have strong background in data structures and algorithms
-Have strong desires to learn and explore new technologies and capable to demonstrate good analysis and problem solving skills
-Produce consistently high quality technical solutions and code implementations independently
-Prior knowledge and experience of transistor level simulator or compiler development (using lex and yacc) are big plus
-Must be proficiency in English communication (in both writing and oral).
- MS/PhD in CS, experience in developing complex software, familiar with C/C++ coding is preferred.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-008
Job Title: Sr. Software Engineer
Description:
-Responsible to support software development, integration and release, life cycle automation, and configuration management for the global Synopsys R&D teams.
-Develops tools and scripts for configuration management, process automation, databases, and dynamic web pages.
- Works on problems of diverse scope where analysis of data requires evaluation of identifiable factors.
- Expected to analyze project areas, refine problem descriptions, and develop novel technical solutions.
- Exercises judgment within generally defined practices and policies in selecting methods and techniques for obtaining solutions.
- Produce consistently high quality technical solutions and code implementations independently.
Requirements:
-BS in CS/CSE with 5+ years or MS with 3+ years of relevant experience in UNIX, Perl, shell scripting languages, programming languages including C and C++, CGI and HTML.
-Significant experience with software integration and release, build tools (make/gmake, etc), and software configuration management tools (RCS, CVS, Clearcase, Perforce, etc).
-It is essential that the individual has strong desires to learn and explore new technologies and are able to demonstrate good analysis and problem solving skills.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SNPS-009
Job Title: Software Engineer
Description:
-Responsible to support software development, integration and release, life cycle automation, and configuration management for the global Synopsys R&D teams.
-Develops tools and scripts for configuration management, process automation, databases, and dynamic web pages.
-Expected to identify classical solutions to problems with little guidance, and implement these independently.
-Works on problems of moderate scope where analysis of situations or data requires a review of identifiable factors.
-Proficient in one specific technical area.
-Works primarily with manager and other engineers across teams.
Requirements:
-BS in CS/CSE with 3+ years of experience in UNIX, Perl, shell scripting languages, programming languages including C and C++, CGI and HTML. Prior knowledge and experience with software integration and release, build tools (make/gmake, etc), and software configuration management tools (RCS, CVS, Clearcase, Perforce, etc).
- It is essential that the individual has strong desires to learn and explore new technologies and are able to demonstrate good analysis and problem solving skills.
世界名牌大学课件下载地址
一、伯克利(Berkeley)
加州大学伯克利分校 http://webcast.berkeley.edu/courses.php
作为美国第一的公立大学，伯克利分校提供了许多优秀教授的播客和视频讲座，可以跟踪最新的讲座。想看教授布置的作业和课堂笔记，可以点击该教授的网页，通常，他/她都会第一堂课留下网址。实在不行，用google搜搜吧！
伯克利的视频都是.rm格式，请注意转换
二、麻省(MIT)
麻省理工学院 http://ocw.mit.edu/OcwWeb/web/courses/courses/index.htm
麻省理工是免费开放教育课件的先驱，计划在今年把１８００门课程的课件都放在网站上，提供课程与作业的ＰＤＦ格式下载。三是，麻省理工只提供少数的视频讲座。坐过学生上麻省有一个绝对优势，麻省理工在中国大陆和中国台湾都建立了镜像网站，把麻省的课程都翻译成立中文。鉴于PDF格式，推荐使用FOXIT READER。
http://www.core.org.cn/（中国大陆）推荐
http://www.myoops.org/（中国台湾）
三、卡耐基梅隆 http://www.cmu.edu/oli/
卡耐基梅隆针对初入大学的大学生，提供１０门学科的课程视频。与其他大学的免费课程一样，非卡耐基梅隆的学子能学习课程，但是为了使学生能够及时了解自己的课程进度，卡耐基梅隆建议造访者在网站上注册，建立自己的资料库。这样一来，你得在有限的时间内完成一门课程，还要参加几次考试，当然，即使你得了１００分，卡耐基梅隆也不会给你开证明，更不会给你学分。
四、犹他
犹他大学 http://ocw.usu.edu/front-page/Courese_listing
犹他大学类似于麻省理工，提供大量的课程课件
五、塔夫茨
塔夫茨大学 http://ocw.tufts.edu/
塔夫茨大学也是“开放式教育课程”的先驱之一，初期提供的课程着重在本校专长的生命科学、跨领域方法、国际观点以及对美国地区性、全国性社群服务的基础理论。
六、公开
英国公开大学 http://openlearn.open.ac.uk/course/index.php
英国十几所大学联合起来，组建了英国公开大学。有一部分课程是对注册学生开放的，但是有一批很好的课程是免费的，并提供视频。每门课还设立了论坛，在社区中，大家发表意见，提供其他的学习资源，互相取经。在这个网站里，最能锻炼自学者的能力，因为你要不停地淘，才能找到宝贝。
七、约翰霍普金斯
约翰霍普金斯 http://ocw.jhsph.edu/topics.cfm
只有极少数人能够进入约翰霍普金斯大学就读，但是，现如今有动机的人不用花一分钱，便能通过网站获得该校的前沿知识。约翰霍普金斯提供了本学院最受欢迎的课程，包括青少年健康、行为和健康、生物统计学、环境、一般公共卫生、卫生政策、预防伤害、母亲和儿童健康、心理卫生、营养、人口科学、公共卫生准备和难民卫生等。
八、Connexions
http://cnx.rice.edu/
CNX.org由莱斯大学开发，号称是课程资源免费共享图书馆。与其他大学不同的事，CNX邀请教授学者建立自己的社区，把自己的最新成果公布于世，接受大家的评价。可以说CNX开辟了大学资源共享的新天地，尤其适合自学能力超强的大学生。有些课程有中文版。
九、索菲亚
索菲亚大学 http://sofia.ocw.cn/gallery
无论是想当一名管理者、作家、评论员、还是要从事设计和IT业的人，索菲亚大学的免费课程肯定让你受益匪浅。索菲亚大学提供了8门学科的课程，其中《企业网络安全实战》已翻译成中文。
十、华盛顿
华盛顿大学 http://www.cs.washington.edu/education/course-webs.html
华盛顿大学的计算机工程学比较强，相关的几百门课程都已经放到网上。不但本科生能找到所需要的课程，连研究生也能淘到宝贝。该网站还提供特色讲座，比如：妇女、计算机与合作。课程不但提供讲座介绍、课堂笔记、有些课程还提供视频。
牛津、斯坦福、耶鲁大学联合网站
http://www.alllearn.org/
哥伦比亚大学
http://ci.columbia.edu/ci
伯克利音乐学院
http://www.berkleeshares.com/
杜克大学法律中心
http://www.law.duke.edu/cspd/lectures
圣母大学
http://ocw.nd.edu/
英国格雷莎姆学院
http://www.gresham.ac.uk/default.asp
加州大学Irvine分校
http://ocw.uci.edu/
富布莱特学校
http://ocw.fetp.edu.vn/home.cfm
日本东京大学
http://ocw.u-tokyo.ac.jp/english
日本早稻田大学
http://www.waseda.jp/ocw/index.html
日本大阪大学
http://ocw.osaka-u.ac.jp/index.php
法国巴黎高科
http://graduateschool.paristech.org/
再给个看大学视频播客的
斯坦福大学 http://itunes.stanford.edu/
加州大学伯克利分校http://itunes.berkeley.edu/
普渡大学http://boilercast.itap.purdue.edu:1013/Boilercast
美国西南理工http://pocast.swtc.edu/lecture/index.php
加州大学洛杉矶分校http://www.bruincast.ucla.edu/
西肯塔基大学http://blog.wku.edu/podcasts
Dupage学院http://www.cod.edu/multimedia/podcast/CODcast/Welcome.html
纽约城市大学http://podcast.york.cuny.edu/lectures
莱斯大学http://webcast.rice.edu/
加州大学圣地亚哥分校http://podcast.ucsd.edu/
剑桥大学http://mediaplayer.group.cam.ac.uk/main/Podcasts.html
美国大学华盛顿法律学院 http://www.wcl.american.edu/podcasts
杜克大学法律学院http://www.law.duke.edu/webcast
乔治敦大学 http://webcast.georgetown.edu/
芝加哥大学商学院 http://www.chicagogsb.edu/multimedia/podcast
波士顿学院 http://frontrow.bc.edu/
哈佛商学院在线
http://www.hbsp.harbard.edu/b02/en/hbr_ideacast.jhtml;jsessioned=NVHF0YFBS5ZCGAKRGWDR5VQBKE0YIISW
威斯康星麦迪逊大学 http://havenscenter.org/audio/audio.htm
约翰霍普金斯大学 http://www.johnshopkins.edu/podcasts.index1.html
伦敦政治经济学院 http://www.lse.ac.uk/rescources/podcasts/Default.htm
普林斯顿大学 http://uc.princeton.edu/main/index.php
英国泰晤士报MBA http://uc.princeton.edu/main/index.php
耶鲁大学 http://www.yale.edu/opa/podcast/
加州大学伯克利分校 http://webcast.berkeley.edu/courses.php
作为美国第一的公立大学，伯克利分校提供了许多优秀教授的播客和视频讲座，可以跟踪最新的讲座。想看教授布置的作业和课堂笔记，可以点击该教授的网页，通常，他/她都会第一堂课留下网址。实在不行，用google搜搜吧！
伯克利的视频都是.rm格式，请注意转换
二、麻省(MIT)
麻省理工学院 http://ocw.mit.edu/OcwWeb/web/courses/courses/index.htm
麻省理工是免费开放教育课件的先驱，计划在今年把１８００门课程的课件都放在网站上，提供课程与作业的ＰＤＦ格式下载。三是，麻省理工只提供少数的视频讲座。坐过学生上麻省有一个绝对优势，麻省理工在中国大陆和中国台湾都建立了镜像网站，把麻省的课程都翻译成立中文。鉴于PDF格式，推荐使用FOXIT READER。
http://www.core.org.cn/（中国大陆）推荐
http://www.myoops.org/（中国台湾）
三、卡耐基梅隆 http://www.cmu.edu/oli/
卡耐基梅隆针对初入大学的大学生，提供１０门学科的课程视频。与其他大学的免费课程一样，非卡耐基梅隆的学子能学习课程，但是为了使学生能够及时了解自己的课程进度，卡耐基梅隆建议造访者在网站上注册，建立自己的资料库。这样一来，你得在有限的时间内完成一门课程，还要参加几次考试，当然，即使你得了１００分，卡耐基梅隆也不会给你开证明，更不会给你学分。
四、犹他
犹他大学 http://ocw.usu.edu/front-page/Courese_listing
犹他大学类似于麻省理工，提供大量的课程课件
五、塔夫茨
塔夫茨大学 http://ocw.tufts.edu/
塔夫茨大学也是“开放式教育课程”的先驱之一，初期提供的课程着重在本校专长的生命科学、跨领域方法、国际观点以及对美国地区性、全国性社群服务的基础理论。
六、公开
英国公开大学 http://openlearn.open.ac.uk/course/index.php
英国十几所大学联合起来，组建了英国公开大学。有一部分课程是对注册学生开放的，但是有一批很好的课程是免费的，并提供视频。每门课还设立了论坛，在社区中，大家发表意见，提供其他的学习资源，互相取经。在这个网站里，最能锻炼自学者的能力，因为你要不停地淘，才能找到宝贝。
七、约翰霍普金斯
约翰霍普金斯 http://ocw.jhsph.edu/topics.cfm
只有极少数人能够进入约翰霍普金斯大学就读，但是，现如今有动机的人不用花一分钱，便能通过网站获得该校的前沿知识。约翰霍普金斯提供了本学院最受欢迎的课程，包括青少年健康、行为和健康、生物统计学、环境、一般公共卫生、卫生政策、预防伤害、母亲和儿童健康、心理卫生、营养、人口科学、公共卫生准备和难民卫生等。
八、Connexions
http://cnx.rice.edu/
CNX.org由莱斯大学开发，号称是课程资源免费共享图书馆。与其他大学不同的事，CNX邀请教授学者建立自己的社区，把自己的最新成果公布于世，接受大家的评价。可以说CNX开辟了大学资源共享的新天地，尤其适合自学能力超强的大学生。有些课程有中文版。
九、索菲亚
索菲亚大学 http://sofia.ocw.cn/gallery
无论是想当一名管理者、作家、评论员、还是要从事设计和IT业的人，索菲亚大学的免费课程肯定让你受益匪浅。索菲亚大学提供了8门学科的课程，其中《企业网络安全实战》已翻译成中文。
十、华盛顿
华盛顿大学 http://www.cs.washington.edu/education/course-webs.html
华盛顿大学的计算机工程学比较强，相关的几百门课程都已经放到网上。不但本科生能找到所需要的课程，连研究生也能淘到宝贝。该网站还提供特色讲座，比如：妇女、计算机与合作。课程不但提供讲座介绍、课堂笔记、有些课程还提供视频。
牛津、斯坦福、耶鲁大学联合网站
http://www.alllearn.org/
哥伦比亚大学
http://ci.columbia.edu/ci
伯克利音乐学院
http://www.berkleeshares.com/
杜克大学法律中心
http://www.law.duke.edu/cspd/lectures
圣母大学
http://ocw.nd.edu/
英国格雷莎姆学院
http://www.gresham.ac.uk/default.asp
加州大学Irvine分校
http://ocw.uci.edu/
富布莱特学校
http://ocw.fetp.edu.vn/home.cfm
日本东京大学
http://ocw.u-tokyo.ac.jp/english
日本早稻田大学
http://www.waseda.jp/ocw/index.html
日本大阪大学
http://ocw.osaka-u.ac.jp/index.php
法国巴黎高科
http://graduateschool.paristech.org/
再给个看大学视频播客的
斯坦福大学 http://itunes.stanford.edu/
加州大学伯克利分校http://itunes.berkeley.edu/
普渡大学http://boilercast.itap.purdue.edu:1013/Boilercast
美国西南理工http://pocast.swtc.edu/lecture/index.php
加州大学洛杉矶分校http://www.bruincast.ucla.edu/
西肯塔基大学http://blog.wku.edu/podcasts
Dupage学院http://www.cod.edu/multimedia/podcast/CODcast/Welcome.html
纽约城市大学http://podcast.york.cuny.edu/lectures
莱斯大学http://webcast.rice.edu/
加州大学圣地亚哥分校http://podcast.ucsd.edu/
剑桥大学http://mediaplayer.group.cam.ac.uk/main/Podcasts.html
美国大学华盛顿法律学院 http://www.wcl.american.edu/podcasts
杜克大学法律学院http://www.law.duke.edu/webcast
乔治敦大学 http://webcast.georgetown.edu/
芝加哥大学商学院 http://www.chicagogsb.edu/multimedia/podcast
波士顿学院 http://frontrow.bc.edu/
哈佛商学院在线
http://www.hbsp.harbard.edu/b02/en/hbr_ideacast.jhtml;jsessioned=NVHF0YFBS5ZCGAKRGWDR5VQBKE0YIISW
威斯康星麦迪逊大学 http://havenscenter.org/audio/audio.htm
约翰霍普金斯大学 http://www.johnshopkins.edu/podcasts.index1.html
伦敦政治经济学院 http://www.lse.ac.uk/rescources/podcasts/Default.htm
普林斯顿大学 http://uc.princeton.edu/main/index.php
英国泰晤士报MBA http://uc.princeton.edu/main/index.php
耶鲁大学 http://www.yale.edu/opa/podcast/
2008年9月22日星期一
"雀巢"深陷奶粉门
"雀巢"在香港深陷奶粉门 (ZT)
东方网记者朱雯婷9月22日报道:有媒体报道称，经香港食物安全中心9月21日公布的新一轮奶类产品样本检测结果显示，雀巢牛奶公司餐饮业用的1公升裝的纯牛奶，发现“三聚氰胺”。而雀巢也是首个深陷奶粉门的国外品牌。
该奶品样本所含的“三聚氰胺”为百万分之1.4，含量低，在一般食用的情况下，不会对健康构成重大影响，但建议不宜给予幼儿饮用。香港食安中心已要求业界停止售卖及回收有关产品。
之前已经有媒体报道，雀巢金装助长1＋奶粉被查出含有三聚氰胺。不过雀巢（中国）有限公司在官网上明确表示，雀巢金装助长1＋奶粉是安全的而且在产品中没有测出三聚氰胺。而对于液态奶的检验结果，雀巢则将尽快给出相关声明。
东方网记者朱雯婷9月22日报道:有媒体报道称，经香港食物安全中心9月21日公布的新一轮奶类产品样本检测结果显示，雀巢牛奶公司餐饮业用的1公升裝的纯牛奶，发现“三聚氰胺”。而雀巢也是首个深陷奶粉门的国外品牌。
该奶品样本所含的“三聚氰胺”为百万分之1.4，含量低，在一般食用的情况下，不会对健康构成重大影响，但建议不宜给予幼儿饮用。香港食安中心已要求业界停止售卖及回收有关产品。
之前已经有媒体报道，雀巢金装助长1＋奶粉被查出含有三聚氰胺。不过雀巢（中国）有限公司在官网上明确表示，雀巢金装助长1＋奶粉是安全的而且在产品中没有测出三聚氰胺。而对于液态奶的检验结果，雀巢则将尽快给出相关声明。
2008年9月21日星期日
爱尔兰咖啡
爱尔兰咖啡（ZT）
有人说爱尔兰咖啡是都柏林机场酒保为了一位美丽空姐而调制的。
酒保在都柏林机场邂逅了这位女孩，因为一见钟情，酒保非常喜欢这位空姐，他觉得她就像爱尔兰的威士忌一样，浓香而醇美，可是她每次来到吧台，总是随着心情点着不同的咖啡，从未点过鸡尾酒。而这位酒保擅长的是调鸡尾酒，他很希望女孩能喝一杯他为她亲手调制的鸡尾酒。后来他终于想到了办法，将爱尔兰威士忌与咖啡结合，成为一种新的饮料，然后将它取名为爱尔兰咖啡，加了menu里，希望女孩能够发现。
可惜这个女孩不是细心的人，所以一直没有发现爱尔兰咖啡。酒保也从未提醒她，只是在吧台内做他份内的工作，然后期待女孩每隔一段时间的光临。后来她终于发现了爱尔兰咖啡，并且点了它。而她也成了第一位品尝爱尔兰咖啡的客人。
女孩之所以成为了第一个品尝爱尔兰咖啡的人，是因为酒保做了两份不一样的menu，一份是深咖啡色的，一份是浅咖啡色的，只有那位女孩才可以看到专门为她制作的那份特殊的menu。
从酒保发明爱尔兰咖啡，到女孩点爱尔兰咖啡，经过了整整一年的时间。当他第一次替她煮爱尔兰咖啡时，因为激动而流下了眼泪。为了怕被她看到，他用手指将眼泪擦去，然后偷偷用眼泪在爱尔兰咖啡杯口画了一圈。所以第一口爱尔兰咖啡的味道，带着思念被压抑许久后所发酵的味道。
那位空姐非常喜欢爱尔兰咖啡，此后只要一停留在都柏林机场，便会点一杯爱尔兰咖啡。久而久之，他们俩人变得很熟识，空姐会跟他说世界各国的趣事，酒保则教她煮爱尔兰咖啡。直到有一天，她决定不再当空姐，跟他说farewell，即不会再见的再见。他最后一次为她煮爱尔兰咖啡时，就问了她一句：Want some teardrops?
他是希望她能体会思念发酵的味道！
空姐回到了旧金山家后，有一天突然想喝爱尔兰咖啡，找遍所有咖啡馆都没有发现。后来她才知道爱尔兰咖啡是酒保专为她而创造的，不过却始终不明白为何酒保会问她：“Want some teardrops ？”没多久，空姐开了家咖啡店，也卖起了爱尔兰咖啡。渐渐地，爱尔兰咖啡便开始在旧金山流行起来，这就是为何爱尔兰咖啡最早出现在爱尔兰都柏林机场，却盛行于旧金山的原因。
空姐走后，酒保也开始让客人点爱尔兰咖啡，所以在都柏林机场喝到爱尔兰咖啡的人，会认为爱尔兰咖啡是鸡尾酒，而在旧金山咖啡馆喝到它的人，会觉得爱尔兰咖啡是咖啡。
有人说爱尔兰咖啡是都柏林机场酒保为了一位美丽空姐而调制的。
酒保在都柏林机场邂逅了这位女孩，因为一见钟情，酒保非常喜欢这位空姐，他觉得她就像爱尔兰的威士忌一样，浓香而醇美，可是她每次来到吧台，总是随着心情点着不同的咖啡，从未点过鸡尾酒。而这位酒保擅长的是调鸡尾酒，他很希望女孩能喝一杯他为她亲手调制的鸡尾酒。后来他终于想到了办法，将爱尔兰威士忌与咖啡结合，成为一种新的饮料，然后将它取名为爱尔兰咖啡，加了menu里，希望女孩能够发现。
可惜这个女孩不是细心的人，所以一直没有发现爱尔兰咖啡。酒保也从未提醒她，只是在吧台内做他份内的工作，然后期待女孩每隔一段时间的光临。后来她终于发现了爱尔兰咖啡，并且点了它。而她也成了第一位品尝爱尔兰咖啡的客人。
女孩之所以成为了第一个品尝爱尔兰咖啡的人，是因为酒保做了两份不一样的menu，一份是深咖啡色的，一份是浅咖啡色的，只有那位女孩才可以看到专门为她制作的那份特殊的menu。
从酒保发明爱尔兰咖啡，到女孩点爱尔兰咖啡，经过了整整一年的时间。当他第一次替她煮爱尔兰咖啡时，因为激动而流下了眼泪。为了怕被她看到，他用手指将眼泪擦去，然后偷偷用眼泪在爱尔兰咖啡杯口画了一圈。所以第一口爱尔兰咖啡的味道，带着思念被压抑许久后所发酵的味道。
那位空姐非常喜欢爱尔兰咖啡，此后只要一停留在都柏林机场，便会点一杯爱尔兰咖啡。久而久之，他们俩人变得很熟识，空姐会跟他说世界各国的趣事，酒保则教她煮爱尔兰咖啡。直到有一天，她决定不再当空姐，跟他说farewell，即不会再见的再见。他最后一次为她煮爱尔兰咖啡时，就问了她一句：Want some teardrops?
他是希望她能体会思念发酵的味道！
空姐回到了旧金山家后，有一天突然想喝爱尔兰咖啡，找遍所有咖啡馆都没有发现。后来她才知道爱尔兰咖啡是酒保专为她而创造的，不过却始终不明白为何酒保会问她：“Want some teardrops ？”没多久，空姐开了家咖啡店，也卖起了爱尔兰咖啡。渐渐地，爱尔兰咖啡便开始在旧金山流行起来，这就是为何爱尔兰咖啡最早出现在爱尔兰都柏林机场，却盛行于旧金山的原因。
空姐走后，酒保也开始让客人点爱尔兰咖啡，所以在都柏林机场喝到爱尔兰咖啡的人，会认为爱尔兰咖啡是鸡尾酒，而在旧金山咖啡馆喝到它的人，会觉得爱尔兰咖啡是咖啡。
商业周刊：Apex将决定雅虎的生死存亡
Apex将决定雅虎的生死存亡，它也许是杨致远带领公司翻身的最后机会。 雅虎将在9月22日在纽约召开的年度广告大会上推出这款名为Apex的平台系统。Apex的目的是让广告客户更容易买卖显示广告。
北京时间9月19日《商业周刊》文章指出，最近，雅虎首席执行官杨致远感到非常疲惫。随着公司利润下降以及营收增长速度降低，雅虎的股票已经跌至19美元以下，处于五年来的最低水平。现在的价位比微软5月撤回收购要约后的雅虎股价还要低40％。股东们也仍然对杨致远满腹牢骚。在那天的会议正式开始后，杨致远开始谈论雅虎即将推出的Apex网络广告系统。他正襟危坐，一字一顿地说：“这是一次豪赌，它将成为新一代广告系统的代表。”
Apex将决定雅虎的生死存亡，它也许是杨致远带领公司翻身的最后机会。 雅虎将在9月22日在纽约召开的年度广告大会上推出这款名为Apex的平台系统。Apex的目的是让广告客户更容易买卖显示广告。
这个系统的核心是一个免费的网络市场，包括雅虎及其报业联盟成员在内的出版商们可以利用Apex平台上的控制台在他们的网页上设置广告位。广告客户可以利用网页访问者的匿名信息有针对性地放置广告。比如，如果某汽车制造商想向芝加哥地区年龄在31岁到40岁之间的已婚女性消费者推销小型轿车，它就可以通过Apex平台知道那些潜在消费者最喜欢登录哪些网站，然后它就可以在那些网站上投放相应的广告。
Apex平台可以提高广告的针对性、扩大广告受众范围以及简化购买广告的过程，杨致远希望这些特性可以让广告客户乐于支付更高的价格。另外，雅虎希望Apex平台可以让广告客户愿意在更多缺乏明显商业价值的剩余页面投放广告，让它的网页使用率达到与谷歌搜索结果网页相近的水平。雅虎希望可以通过这种方式缩小它与谷歌之间的差距。业内分析师预计，谷歌今年的营收可能为162亿美元，而雅虎的营收可能只有56亿美元。
根据雅虎与谷歌之前达成的广告交易，有些报纸已经在某些雅虎网站上获得了两到三倍于雅虎自己所得的广告收入。由于广告受众范围的扩大，吸引了更多的广告客户，Cox报业在雅虎上销售广告的业务今年多获得了100万美元的收入。 Apex可以自动实现上述过程，这样合作伙伴就可以在许多雅虎网页上销售广告。Cox报业数字媒体副总裁Leon Levitt表示，公司最后打算将所有的显示广告业务都从目前的合作伙伴DoubleClick转向雅虎。
雅虎与谷歌达成的网络广告合作协议最近面临着反垄断官员的审查。如果这项交易落空，杨致远只有依赖显示广告来提升公司收入，以证明自己并没有因抵制微软的收购而乱了阵脚。 同时，竞争对手也在开发类似于Apex的计划。预计谷歌明年将扩大DoubleClick自己的广告平台规模，加强广告买卖双方的沟通。 微软也打算在明年扩展其显示广告的受众范围。
雅虎面临着太多的问题。其最新的软件计划即巴拿马搜索广告系统的发布时间被多次推迟，而且也未能超越谷歌。
另外，雅虎一直擅长吸引用户，但并不擅长开发创新技术。 实际上，Apex中的核心技术来自于雅虎去年收购的Right Media。除此之外，Apex是否具有同谷歌、微软、Facebook和大批网络初创公司抗衡的实力还是个未知数。 杨致远表示：“我们必须建立一个适用于Web 2.0世界的广告系统。”否则，未来的雅虎将逐渐被时代淘汰，或者雅虎新董事卡尔伊坎和其他股东就能如愿以偿了，雅虎就可能被微软一口吞掉。
当雅虎的业绩从2006年下半年开始走下坡路时，它就开始启动Apex计划了。但是直到2007年6月原广告销售主管Wenda Millard辞职时，Apex计划才开始进入公众的视野。 雅虎当时发表了一份少有的声明，声称整个行业已经发生变化，对高管的领导能力提出了新的要求。不久，前首席执行官塞梅尔辞职，杨致远接任成为新首席执行官。
尽管领导层出现了上述变化，Apex计划一直在按部就班地进行。六位项目领导和高管每周日上午7点都会召开一次会议，用一个小时的时间制定下周的工作计划。 随着2007年12月工作演示系统期限的临近，工作组昼夜不停地完善代码。
Apex最终顺利完成开发计划，当时雅虎的业务却更加恶化。 雅虎在1月29日发布第四季度财报，结果季度利润猛降了23％，股价应声跌至四年来的最低点。两天后，微软向雅虎提出收购要约。 尽管如此，Apex平台仍在今年8月中旬按时交付给报纸合作伙伴使用。
当时雅虎的工作还没有结束。它将在今年和明年向报纸出版商和其他合作伙伴开放Apex平台。随后，Apex平台还将被推荐给广告客户、代理商、广告网络。 同时，随着经济增长减速，显示广告的增长也开始减速。 虽然杨致远强调雅虎必须打持久战，但是留给他的时间已经不多了。
北京时间9月19日《商业周刊》文章指出，最近，雅虎首席执行官杨致远感到非常疲惫。随着公司利润下降以及营收增长速度降低，雅虎的股票已经跌至19美元以下，处于五年来的最低水平。现在的价位比微软5月撤回收购要约后的雅虎股价还要低40％。股东们也仍然对杨致远满腹牢骚。在那天的会议正式开始后，杨致远开始谈论雅虎即将推出的Apex网络广告系统。他正襟危坐，一字一顿地说：“这是一次豪赌，它将成为新一代广告系统的代表。”
Apex将决定雅虎的生死存亡，它也许是杨致远带领公司翻身的最后机会。 雅虎将在9月22日在纽约召开的年度广告大会上推出这款名为Apex的平台系统。Apex的目的是让广告客户更容易买卖显示广告。
这个系统的核心是一个免费的网络市场，包括雅虎及其报业联盟成员在内的出版商们可以利用Apex平台上的控制台在他们的网页上设置广告位。广告客户可以利用网页访问者的匿名信息有针对性地放置广告。比如，如果某汽车制造商想向芝加哥地区年龄在31岁到40岁之间的已婚女性消费者推销小型轿车，它就可以通过Apex平台知道那些潜在消费者最喜欢登录哪些网站，然后它就可以在那些网站上投放相应的广告。
Apex平台可以提高广告的针对性、扩大广告受众范围以及简化购买广告的过程，杨致远希望这些特性可以让广告客户乐于支付更高的价格。另外，雅虎希望Apex平台可以让广告客户愿意在更多缺乏明显商业价值的剩余页面投放广告，让它的网页使用率达到与谷歌搜索结果网页相近的水平。雅虎希望可以通过这种方式缩小它与谷歌之间的差距。业内分析师预计，谷歌今年的营收可能为162亿美元，而雅虎的营收可能只有56亿美元。
根据雅虎与谷歌之前达成的广告交易，有些报纸已经在某些雅虎网站上获得了两到三倍于雅虎自己所得的广告收入。由于广告受众范围的扩大，吸引了更多的广告客户，Cox报业在雅虎上销售广告的业务今年多获得了100万美元的收入。 Apex可以自动实现上述过程，这样合作伙伴就可以在许多雅虎网页上销售广告。Cox报业数字媒体副总裁Leon Levitt表示，公司最后打算将所有的显示广告业务都从目前的合作伙伴DoubleClick转向雅虎。
雅虎与谷歌达成的网络广告合作协议最近面临着反垄断官员的审查。如果这项交易落空，杨致远只有依赖显示广告来提升公司收入，以证明自己并没有因抵制微软的收购而乱了阵脚。 同时，竞争对手也在开发类似于Apex的计划。预计谷歌明年将扩大DoubleClick自己的广告平台规模，加强广告买卖双方的沟通。 微软也打算在明年扩展其显示广告的受众范围。
雅虎面临着太多的问题。其最新的软件计划即巴拿马搜索广告系统的发布时间被多次推迟，而且也未能超越谷歌。
另外，雅虎一直擅长吸引用户，但并不擅长开发创新技术。 实际上，Apex中的核心技术来自于雅虎去年收购的Right Media。除此之外，Apex是否具有同谷歌、微软、Facebook和大批网络初创公司抗衡的实力还是个未知数。 杨致远表示：“我们必须建立一个适用于Web 2.0世界的广告系统。”否则，未来的雅虎将逐渐被时代淘汰，或者雅虎新董事卡尔伊坎和其他股东就能如愿以偿了，雅虎就可能被微软一口吞掉。
当雅虎的业绩从2006年下半年开始走下坡路时，它就开始启动Apex计划了。但是直到2007年6月原广告销售主管Wenda Millard辞职时，Apex计划才开始进入公众的视野。 雅虎当时发表了一份少有的声明，声称整个行业已经发生变化，对高管的领导能力提出了新的要求。不久，前首席执行官塞梅尔辞职，杨致远接任成为新首席执行官。
尽管领导层出现了上述变化，Apex计划一直在按部就班地进行。六位项目领导和高管每周日上午7点都会召开一次会议，用一个小时的时间制定下周的工作计划。 随着2007年12月工作演示系统期限的临近，工作组昼夜不停地完善代码。
Apex最终顺利完成开发计划，当时雅虎的业务却更加恶化。 雅虎在1月29日发布第四季度财报，结果季度利润猛降了23％，股价应声跌至四年来的最低点。两天后，微软向雅虎提出收购要约。 尽管如此，Apex平台仍在今年8月中旬按时交付给报纸合作伙伴使用。
当时雅虎的工作还没有结束。它将在今年和明年向报纸出版商和其他合作伙伴开放Apex平台。随后，Apex平台还将被推荐给广告客户、代理商、广告网络。 同时，随着经济增长减速，显示广告的增长也开始减速。 虽然杨致远强调雅虎必须打持久战，但是留给他的时间已经不多了。
情侣之间情色短信（ZT）
1.前天早上睡醒短他：你的肉体在那里？
他回：快到南京了!
我：哦，请你好好照顾你的肉体，我比较关心他！祖国河山是否一片大好？
他回：结婚人挺多！人民安康。。。。
2.没事发短信骚扰他
我：老公我要么…
他：我给！
我：老公我还要…
他：再给！
我：还要么…
他：麽了，再给就是尿了！
我倒！
3.我:早上好.先生需要什么特别的服务吗?
他:需要
我:晕!台词错了，重来～
他:你们有什么特殊服务呀?
我:※*&^$$#+*^$^$##
我:你起来了没有?
他:整体没有起来.你一说特殊服务部分起来了!!!
4.闲来无事短他
好消息:<新婚姻法>规定,一个女人可以找4个BF,一个负责繁殖,一个负责外交,一个负责家务,一个负责夜生活,即日起开始实行,我准备娶3个,你先挑做哪个?
他回:可以除了家务都选么？
我回：不行
他回：夜!
5.上班无聊，给BF短信：喂喂喂，说你呢，别流着哈喇子瞅着美女出神，没见过美女似的，丢人现眼。
BF回复：锤子，老子正对着小白呢
6.和朋友在外面吃饭
短他说：我在喝木瓜牛奶，张NN的～
他回：哦，那我吃黄瓜，张JJ的～
7.每天晚上都要打电话或短信后才睡。
我：好了，要睡觉了，亲一个！
他：啵！
我：再亲一个！
他：啵！
我：还要亲一个！
他：啵！
我：还要嘛～～～
他：……流氓！！！
完了爆笑，搞得我都睡不着了～～～
8.我：到家了吗？好好休息啊。
他：我有二奶照顾你放心啊！到家睡觉！晚安！
我：好！代我谢谢二奶哦！晚安！
9.他出差
我发：在小老婆那甜蜜呢？
他回：不是，在三老婆这呢，大老婆你先睡吧。
10.我发:天冷,出门多批件袈裟
他回:多谢师太
11.我：晚上自己解决啊！（我的意思是晚饭）
他：用手啊？（不知道他想哪里去了）
我：不要想歪，我说是吃饭～
他：NN的，老婆坏坏哦～
12.我: BF我在便便,你在吃饭吗?
他: .........
13.我：我在楼下了，有好多吃的
他：（很兴奋）真的啊，我马上来接你
过了一会 ……
他：人呢？怎么没看到
我：我在我家楼下啊？
14.我：小弟弟，来姐姐家，姐姐给你一根棒棒糖
他：好！
我：没点矜持！之前教你的哪去了
他：那好，给我两根我才去！
我：＃@#￥%…………
他：好闷啊！
我：那我们来玩色医生叔叔给无知少女检查身体的游戏吧
他：表，人家要玩怪老师课后留下小妹妹！
我：％@#￥%※
15.他:偶在地铁上看见美女了
我:....怒
他:她还跟我搭讪呢
我:她跟你说什么``(吃醋)
他:离我远点!!!!!
我:崩溃～
16.有天晚，洁面后贴黄瓜
男友打来电话～我按掉，回：宝贝儿,我正贴黄瓜呢，嘴八封住了……一会吧
回：MD便宜那黄瓜了！告诉他那是我专利！
回：别闹～贴黄瓜不能笑的！
回：好在它也姓黄，算了，不跟它一般见识拉～
我笑喷～贴在脸上的黄瓜全掉下～～～
17.我发；小妞来给大爷笑一个
他回；哇哈哈哈哈，你这彪悍的小妞
我回；严肃点，看我回去收拾你
他回；我刚不都笑了么，你为啥还要收拾人家呀？
我回；笑得太大声，吓到本大爷了。
18.我：朕有新欢了，爱妃自谋生路去吧～～
他：你敢！跟你没完 （马上转换角色）
我：奴婢不敢，奴婢愿侍奉终生～
他：来，给大爷跳个舞～～
19.我：臣妾今晚不能来侍寝，也请陛下早些歇息，养足精神，明日再来翻臣妾的牌子。
他：朕有后宫佳丽三千，此事爱妃不必太过忧虑，还须耐住寂寞：）
我：看来今晚非杀回来投毒不可！
他：说笑说笑，借朕几个胆子也不敢翻别人的牌子，况且朕的后宫牌子虽多，写的可都是一个人的名字：）
20.我：老板，在哪嫖哪～
他：只嫖你，今天是什么颜色（内裤）
我：本小姐今天客满，下次客官请赶早
他：哼
21.我：小妞，给大爷我笑一个
他：唉呀陈员外，陈大爷，你可是好些天不来看人家哦—……%￥#*#晓女子近些天学了十八摸的段子，要是陈员外不嫌弃小女子，那我就给员外来一段。
22.我坐他腿上，食指勾他下巴 ：妞儿，给爷来个曲儿
他：-_-！
我：怎的？ 怕爷我付不起银子？
他：爷您每次吃白食儿之前，都是这么说的！
23.我：妞，给大爷笑一个～
他：大爷你上次的帐还没给结呢～
我：赊账！咱俩谁跟谁啊
他：真没嫖品！！！
24.他：亲爱的，你看，天上有雪花在飘耶，好浪漫耶！
我：亲爱的，咱们回家吧，你的白内障越来越严重了耶！
25.他：亲爱的，你看，天上有一行白鹭在飞耶，好漂亮呀！
我：别嚷那么大声，你这个色盲！那是大雁！
26.他：亲爱的，你什么时候回来啊？
我：我绝对不会告诉你好让你有时间整理作案现场的。
27.我：亲爱的，我下午洗了二十三只袜子，累死我了。
他：*！怎么会有单数的？！是不是有一双袜子只剩一只了？
我：不是啊，是有三双袜子都只剩一只了耶。
他:......
28.我：亲爱的，快亲我一下，快亲我一下。
他：为什么这么急？
我：我刚才吃了药，嘴巴好苦！
他:刚好我刚亲的那妞嘴好甜，咱俩综合一下~
我：怒~哪个妞？
他:刚没喝药的那个妞~
29.我：亲爱的你知道为什么小黄和小白玩猜拳玩了一天都不分胜负吗？
他:……
我:因为小黄和小白是两只猪猪，它们只会出剪刀.
他:……
我：哈哈哈哈……你为什么不笑？给我笑！
他：哈哈，哈哈...
30.我：快点起床！
他：听见啦！过来，小妞，给大爷唱个曲儿
我：……
他：什么？！敢不唱？！那大爷我给你唱个曲儿吧。
31.我：亲爱的，你看，我大姨妈来了，好多血啊。
他：*！你喝番茄汁的时候就不能小心一点？！
我：那么凶干吗！小心我让你也来大姨妈，嘻嘻
他：好吧，老婆我错了！
32.我：亲爱的，你带我散步都散了这么久了，我们也该回家了吧。
他：亲爱的，实话告诉你吧，其实我迷路了。
33.我：咱们一直散步到那条马路吧。
他：到那儿太远了，一会儿该走不回来了。
我：没事，你背我回来。
34.我：亲爱的，我给你做了一条内裤，看看喜不喜欢。
他：没事干吗给我做内裤？有什么阴谋？
我：不是啊，老公，我本来想给自己做条7分裤的，发现长了，就剪了一点，然后发现还是长，又剪了一点，然后就剪一点，剪一点，就变成内裤了.....
他:……
35.我：老公我要…
他：…等会，现在忙
我：你不爱我~
他：那你先把衣脱了吧？
我：自己脱没感觉！
（他刚碰到我）
我：非礼啊~
他：。。。。。。
36 他：脚好没
我：没好，还痛
他：那我上来拿东西好了
我：呆会吧，小六子还裸着呢
他：那你先稳着他，让他别穿，我马上上来
我：.......
37 他：吃这个
我：嗯
他：吃这个
我：不要，我不喜欢吃黄瓜
他：不喜欢吃？难道喜欢用？
我：我喜欢用丝瓜。。。。
他：好吧，你赢了。。
他回：快到南京了!
我：哦，请你好好照顾你的肉体，我比较关心他！祖国河山是否一片大好？
他回：结婚人挺多！人民安康。。。。
2.没事发短信骚扰他
我：老公我要么…
他：我给！
我：老公我还要…
他：再给！
我：还要么…
他：麽了，再给就是尿了！
我倒！
3.我:早上好.先生需要什么特别的服务吗?
他:需要
我:晕!台词错了，重来～
他:你们有什么特殊服务呀?
我:※*&^$$#+*^$^$##
我:你起来了没有?
他:整体没有起来.你一说特殊服务部分起来了!!!
4.闲来无事短他
好消息:<新婚姻法>规定,一个女人可以找4个BF,一个负责繁殖,一个负责外交,一个负责家务,一个负责夜生活,即日起开始实行,我准备娶3个,你先挑做哪个?
他回:可以除了家务都选么？
我回：不行
他回：夜!
5.上班无聊，给BF短信：喂喂喂，说你呢，别流着哈喇子瞅着美女出神，没见过美女似的，丢人现眼。
BF回复：锤子，老子正对着小白呢
6.和朋友在外面吃饭
短他说：我在喝木瓜牛奶，张NN的～
他回：哦，那我吃黄瓜，张JJ的～
7.每天晚上都要打电话或短信后才睡。
我：好了，要睡觉了，亲一个！
他：啵！
我：再亲一个！
他：啵！
我：还要亲一个！
他：啵！
我：还要嘛～～～
他：……流氓！！！
完了爆笑，搞得我都睡不着了～～～
8.我：到家了吗？好好休息啊。
他：我有二奶照顾你放心啊！到家睡觉！晚安！
我：好！代我谢谢二奶哦！晚安！
9.他出差
我发：在小老婆那甜蜜呢？
他回：不是，在三老婆这呢，大老婆你先睡吧。
10.我发:天冷,出门多批件袈裟
他回:多谢师太
11.我：晚上自己解决啊！（我的意思是晚饭）
他：用手啊？（不知道他想哪里去了）
我：不要想歪，我说是吃饭～
他：NN的，老婆坏坏哦～
12.我: BF我在便便,你在吃饭吗?
他: .........
13.我：我在楼下了，有好多吃的
他：（很兴奋）真的啊，我马上来接你
过了一会 ……
他：人呢？怎么没看到
我：我在我家楼下啊？
14.我：小弟弟，来姐姐家，姐姐给你一根棒棒糖
他：好！
我：没点矜持！之前教你的哪去了
他：那好，给我两根我才去！
我：＃@#￥%…………
他：好闷啊！
我：那我们来玩色医生叔叔给无知少女检查身体的游戏吧
他：表，人家要玩怪老师课后留下小妹妹！
我：％@#￥%※
15.他:偶在地铁上看见美女了
我:....怒
他:她还跟我搭讪呢
我:她跟你说什么``(吃醋)
他:离我远点!!!!!
我:崩溃～
16.有天晚，洁面后贴黄瓜
男友打来电话～我按掉，回：宝贝儿,我正贴黄瓜呢，嘴八封住了……一会吧
回：MD便宜那黄瓜了！告诉他那是我专利！
回：别闹～贴黄瓜不能笑的！
回：好在它也姓黄，算了，不跟它一般见识拉～
我笑喷～贴在脸上的黄瓜全掉下～～～
17.我发；小妞来给大爷笑一个
他回；哇哈哈哈哈，你这彪悍的小妞
我回；严肃点，看我回去收拾你
他回；我刚不都笑了么，你为啥还要收拾人家呀？
我回；笑得太大声，吓到本大爷了。
18.我：朕有新欢了，爱妃自谋生路去吧～～
他：你敢！跟你没完 （马上转换角色）
我：奴婢不敢，奴婢愿侍奉终生～
他：来，给大爷跳个舞～～
19.我：臣妾今晚不能来侍寝，也请陛下早些歇息，养足精神，明日再来翻臣妾的牌子。
他：朕有后宫佳丽三千，此事爱妃不必太过忧虑，还须耐住寂寞：）
我：看来今晚非杀回来投毒不可！
他：说笑说笑，借朕几个胆子也不敢翻别人的牌子，况且朕的后宫牌子虽多，写的可都是一个人的名字：）
20.我：老板，在哪嫖哪～
他：只嫖你，今天是什么颜色（内裤）
我：本小姐今天客满，下次客官请赶早
他：哼
21.我：小妞，给大爷我笑一个
他：唉呀陈员外，陈大爷，你可是好些天不来看人家哦—……%￥#*#晓女子近些天学了十八摸的段子，要是陈员外不嫌弃小女子，那我就给员外来一段。
22.我坐他腿上，食指勾他下巴 ：妞儿，给爷来个曲儿
他：-_-！
我：怎的？ 怕爷我付不起银子？
他：爷您每次吃白食儿之前，都是这么说的！
23.我：妞，给大爷笑一个～
他：大爷你上次的帐还没给结呢～
我：赊账！咱俩谁跟谁啊
他：真没嫖品！！！
24.他：亲爱的，你看，天上有雪花在飘耶，好浪漫耶！
我：亲爱的，咱们回家吧，你的白内障越来越严重了耶！
25.他：亲爱的，你看，天上有一行白鹭在飞耶，好漂亮呀！
我：别嚷那么大声，你这个色盲！那是大雁！
26.他：亲爱的，你什么时候回来啊？
我：我绝对不会告诉你好让你有时间整理作案现场的。
27.我：亲爱的，我下午洗了二十三只袜子，累死我了。
他：*！怎么会有单数的？！是不是有一双袜子只剩一只了？
我：不是啊，是有三双袜子都只剩一只了耶。
他:......
28.我：亲爱的，快亲我一下，快亲我一下。
他：为什么这么急？
我：我刚才吃了药，嘴巴好苦！
他:刚好我刚亲的那妞嘴好甜，咱俩综合一下~
我：怒~哪个妞？
他:刚没喝药的那个妞~
29.我：亲爱的你知道为什么小黄和小白玩猜拳玩了一天都不分胜负吗？
他:……
我:因为小黄和小白是两只猪猪，它们只会出剪刀.
他:……
我：哈哈哈哈……你为什么不笑？给我笑！
他：哈哈，哈哈...
30.我：快点起床！
他：听见啦！过来，小妞，给大爷唱个曲儿
我：……
他：什么？！敢不唱？！那大爷我给你唱个曲儿吧。
31.我：亲爱的，你看，我大姨妈来了，好多血啊。
他：*！你喝番茄汁的时候就不能小心一点？！
我：那么凶干吗！小心我让你也来大姨妈，嘻嘻
他：好吧，老婆我错了！
32.我：亲爱的，你带我散步都散了这么久了，我们也该回家了吧。
他：亲爱的，实话告诉你吧，其实我迷路了。
33.我：咱们一直散步到那条马路吧。
他：到那儿太远了，一会儿该走不回来了。
我：没事，你背我回来。
34.我：亲爱的，我给你做了一条内裤，看看喜不喜欢。
他：没事干吗给我做内裤？有什么阴谋？
我：不是啊，老公，我本来想给自己做条7分裤的，发现长了，就剪了一点，然后发现还是长，又剪了一点，然后就剪一点，剪一点，就变成内裤了.....
他:……
35.我：老公我要…
他：…等会，现在忙
我：你不爱我~
他：那你先把衣脱了吧？
我：自己脱没感觉！
（他刚碰到我）
我：非礼啊~
他：。。。。。。
36 他：脚好没
我：没好，还痛
他：那我上来拿东西好了
我：呆会吧，小六子还裸着呢
他：那你先稳着他，让他别穿，我马上上来
我：.......
37 他：吃这个
我：嗯
他：吃这个
我：不要，我不喜欢吃黄瓜
他：不喜欢吃？难道喜欢用？
我：我喜欢用丝瓜。。。。
他：好吧，你赢了。。
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